Melbourne International Comedy Festival acknowledges the traditional custodians of the lands upon which we work and live. We acknowledge the Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples' spirit, imagination and rich history of storytelling and humour that is an inspiration to all Australians.

We accept the invitation to walk together with First Nations people towards a more positive future for Australia, as described in the Uluru Statement From The Heart.

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Mel & Sam The Platonic Human Centipede

Mel & Sam The Platonic Human Centipede

Winner Best Original Songs 2023 Green Room Awards

Winner Best Cabaret Weekly Award 2022 Adelaide Fringe 

Nominee Golden Gibbo 2022 Melbourne International Comedy Festival

Nominee Best Ensemble 2023 Green Room Awards

Nominee Best Cabaret 2022 Melbourne Fringe Festival 

Nominee Best Writing 2022 Green Room Awards 

You can love someone so much you think the sun shines out of their ass… but what about respecting them enough to stitch your mouth to their anus, so that they never have to call you on speed dial again – 'cos you’re just there! “Hey girl!” Where’s the cabaret about that?

Join multi-award-winning queer comedy duo Mel & Sam in this side-splitting, synth-soaring selection of songs and sketches to champion the one thing we love most – the unsung duos of the modern world!

Because you know Hamish & Andy. You know Thelma & Louise. But the girls are about to blow your minds with how many ass-eating duos are really out there.

What about Boomer Dads & Standing On Decks With Their Arms Crossed? How about Hillary Duff & Vocal Warm Ups On ‘La’? What about 12-Year-Old Boys On The Internet & Telling Sam She Looks Like Minecraft Steve? How about Commercial Musical Theatre Productions & Casting Football Stars As Their Leading Man? 'Cos those are duos too and god damn it, they’re getting a ballad! (Tonight's production will be performed by Shane Crawford.)

With an all-original soundtrack with songs including: ‘#NotAllFlowerpotMen: Bill and Ben’s Lament’, ‘My Pussy And My Parking Tickets’, ‘Simons Says Says So Much He Gets Nodules’ and many more, this turbo-charged hour of musical madness will leave you fed, frightened and seeing double.

Because whilst the girls may have never seen The Human Centipede, the takeaway from that film is clear – there is aaaaaalways more you can do to show your other half you love them. 

Dad, you probs won’t get most of this one.

Unless you watch it from your deck.


'Screamingly funny.' ★★★★★ Adelaide Advertiser

'The future of Australian comedy.' ★★★★ Herald Sun

'A chart-topping parody pop duo in the making.' ★★★★★ The Age

'The makings of comedy greats Jane Turner and Gina Riley.' ★★★★★ Theatre Thoughts

'Powerhouse, kick-ass cabaret performers who own the stage – and probably any neighbouring ones too.' ★★★★ Chorlte (UK)

'Has to be seen to be believed.' ★★★★★ Time Out

Suitable for audiences 15+

This show contains: Audience participation, Strong coarse language, Strong sexual references, Sudden loud noises.


Before and after the show

  • Eat, drink, laugh, repeat

    Check out our partner bars and restaurants across the CBD - many offering exclusive deals for ticketholders!

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  • The Festival Club

    Your very own late-night treat for laughs, dancing and all-round good times.

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